Kevelations

Personal Grace and Style

Someone asked me on Facebook this morning, whose wardrobe I would choose to wear, if they would give it to me.  This question gave me pause because I never really thought about copying someone else’s wardrobe and/or behavior.  As such, I wanted to expand on why in the below post.

Style. A distinctive or characteristic mode of action. Whether it be a wardrobe choice, walking with grace or a basic eye for design, it is something that should be important to all of us because it affects how we are perceived in both our work and personal lives.

Style is more than just dressing smartly. It is a way of carrying yourself so that when people think of you, they think of elegance and grace. When people think of grace, they usually think of cultural icons like Grace Kelly or Audrey Hepburn. They forget that men can be graceful too.

Think about Fred Astaire. He wasn’t someone who was particularly handsome but he is remembered and revered because of his natural grace. He dressed smartly in tailored suits and his trademark fedora. He walked with confidence, as opposed to arrogance, and carried himself in such a way that people wanted to know him, they wanted to be him.

While Astaire was always well dressed, he also made bold fashion choices at the time, such as substituting a brightly colored tie for a belt.  His fashion choices were timeless and fashion forward. He dressed elegantly in a time when men were expected to dress well, look clean and altogether polished.

One of the most important things needed to maintain a sense of grace is to be well mannered, kind and sincere. It is a real art to maintain your manners at all times, especially under duress. We all slip up at times and might lose our cool. However, it is important to keep practicing and trying so that we can be polite without thinking twice about it. In moments of difficulty, try to put on the façade of being collected and wait to lose your cool until you are alone. If you need to excuse yourself from the situation and go into the bathroom to calm down, do so. In a time where your job performance takes precedence over being well mannered, your manners will make you stand out. Trust me.  Besides, who says you can’t get results while maintaining an aura of grace and self confidence?

That said, what can we learn from Fred…?

1)      Everything must appear effortless. If you wear a suit every day, you should look nearly as comfortable as you would in a T shirt and jeans. If suits are too formal for your personal style, make sure your clothes are tailored to fit you perfectly. Your focus should be on looking polished, not just trendy.

2)      Be willing to take risks. While this concept is often associated with Astaire’s fashion choices, I believe it is a great mantra to follow in everyday life. If you risk nothing, you risk even more because you will never know what could have been if you had followed your heart instead of taking the “safe” road. Fortune favors the bold so use that to your advantage.

3)      Find a signature accessory that people can associate with you. Be it a fedora, your shoes, your watch, your tie or your belt. Find something that symbolizes your individuality and personality and incorporate it into your wardrobe so that people begin to expect you to wear it while at the same time, it still catches their eye and forces them to look twice whenever they see it.

4)      Own the way you look. Look, we all have insecurities and things that we don’t particularly like about ourselves – be it in our physicality or personality.  There are only two ways to deal with this, either you can own it or change it. Don’t let your fears diminish your sense of self or your confidence. By owning how you look, your self confidence will increase and confidence is a look that will never go out of style.

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